BeanQuest

January 6, 2007

More Mole Advice

Filed under: homeowning, mole — Brian @ 7:50 am

These guys have all the answers. And the answers, near as I can tell, are “nothing works, except these traps. And we have a video!”

Now, I’m not disparaging them. Quite the contrary. I have little doubt that they’re right, and I do like their style:

The price of our trapping kit is $39.99, and is the last money you will ever spend on moles. But if you prefer, you could instead use that money to buy one sonic mole chaser, two bags of grub insecticide, three bottles of castor oil spray, four boxes of shotgun shells, or 600 sticks of Juicy Fruit Chewing Gum. But you already know that stuff doesn’t work. Right?

I’ve already ruled out the sonic mole chaser and the castor oil spray. The grub killer was off the list, but, after having found some grubs on Christmas Eve, it’s back there under “maybe.” Juicy Fruit is still the front-runner, and I refuse to rule out anything involving explosions, even if they are small ones. But I still don’t have a shotgun, and I’m still reasonably confident that discharging one in my backyard would invite disapproving frowns from my neighbors, if not the sheriff.

It turns out that their trapping kit is two of the scissor traps that I didn’t buy because I don’t want to hobble my dogs. But it comes with a video. I admit to a substantial curiosity about the content of that video.

I’ll leave these guys on the “maybe” list, to be more thoroughly evaluated after I finish making a fool of myself by planting specially-prepared (worm scented!) Juicy Fruit gum in my yard for a few weeks.

It’s a good thing they called off winter this year in Ohio.

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